Planning for Peace: Understanding End-of-Life Wishes and Living Wills
Talking about end-of-life care isn’t easy. Most of us would rather focus on the day-to-day moments that make life full: our kids’ laughter, family dinners, or time spent outdoors. But taking a few minutes now to think about what kind of care you’d want if you couldn’t speak for yourself can make all the difference for your loved ones later.
That’s where a living will comes in.
What Is a Living Will?
A living will — also called an advance directive for a natural death in North Carolina — is a legal document that outlines your wishes for medical treatment if you become seriously ill or injured and are unable to communicate.
It answers questions like:
Do you want life support if your doctors believe you won’t recover?
Would you want artificial nutrition or hydration?
Do you want your doctors to use all available measures, or do you prefer comfort care?
Your living will helps doctors and family members understand what you would want — and just as importantly, it relieves your loved ones of the burden of guessing.
How a Living Will Differs from a Health Care Power of Attorney
While a living will provides your instructions, a Health Care Power of Attorney names a person — often a spouse, partner, or close friend — to make medical decisions for you if you’re unable to do so.
Think of it this way:
Living Will = Your Voice
Health Care Power of Attorney = Your Decision-Maker
These two documents work together. Your living will expresses your wishes; your health care agent carries them out.
Why It Matters for Families
Making these choices in advance may feel uncomfortable, but it’s an incredible act of love. In moments of crisis, your family won’t have to wonder or argue about what you might have wanted. They’ll have the peace of knowing they’re following your wishes.
Many of my clients tell me that completing this document gave them relief — a sense of calm knowing their family would have clear guidance if the unexpected happened.
North Carolina Requirements
In North Carolina, your living will must:
Be signed and dated by you while you’re of sound mind
Be witnessed by two qualified adults
Be notarized
You can file your living will with the North Carolina Advance Health Care Directive Registry, but it’s not required. I usually recommend giving copies to your health care agent, family, and doctor’s office to make sure it’s easily accessible when needed.
How to Start the Conversation
This can be a sensitive topic, but it’s one worth having. Try framing it around care, not fear. For example:
“If I ever can’t speak for myself, I want you to know what matters most to me.”
Starting early — when everyone is calm and healthy — helps ensure your choices reflect your values, not the stress of the moment.
Final Thoughts
A living will doesn’t mean giving up hope. It means planning with love, clarity, and courage. It’s one of the kindest gifts you can give to your family — the comfort of knowing exactly what you want when they need it most.
If you’re ready to create your living will or talk about end-of-life planning, I’d be honored to help you. Let’s Get Started, and let’s make sure your wishes are known and respected.
